I burnt out badly. Here's how I am (still) recovering.
Google says it takes a year to recover from burnout. Is there truth in that?
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I feel like a different person. Before my burnout episode, I spent a lot of time as ‘Performing Emma’ — the side of me who feels she has to be on form! Full of beans! In a good mood! Posting online! Being productive! So happy to see you!! ‘Performing Emma’ used to check everyone was OK all the time, crack jokes to fill awkward silences, fussed and planned and prepped when people came round for dinner. ‘Performing Emma’ used to try and impress people all the time. ‘Performing Emma’ was draining, she leaked energy everywhere, but now, she’s gone. I actually felt her die. Which was weird. And sad. But in her place is this softer Quieter Emma. I’m enjoying spending time with her. ‘Quieter Emma’ doesn’t make as much outward effort but she is just as happy to see you. People say that a lot, don’t they? “I feel like a different person.” I think it’s because after something catalytic happens in your life, you actually are.